It wasn't until I read this article in the Chicago Tribune that I realized there is a term for these monstrosities. I am tolerant of a lot of personal grooming choices, but if the Pork Chop ever came home with one of these, we would definitely have words. I've seen these things around quite a bit lately, and I always think the same thing: why would anyone do this to themselves? According to the article, "a lot of guys grow messy beards because they're going through a difficult time or because they want to buck a trend. For most guys, it's just a phase."
A very ugly phase.
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